When it comes to end-of-life reflections, one common theme echoes through the stories of those I’ve sat with—"I wish I had said yes more." Whether it's saying yes to new experiences, setting healthy boundaries, or engaging in those hard, necessary conversations, the power of embracing life fully becomes clear when people look back on their journey. But why wait until the end to realize it?
As a Death Doula, I’ve witnessed firsthand the pain that comes with wishing you’d done things differently, and the peace that can follow when people say yes to what matters, right now. This doesn’t mean saying yes to every whim, but rather embracing the opportunities that truly align with your values, help you grow, and make life feel more complete. So let’s explore how saying yes now can help ensure you live a life with fewer regrets.
The Importance of Saying Yes to Experiences
Think back to moments when you hesitated—maybe you were too scared, too busy, or too uncertain. Those moments add up, and for many, they form the foundation of regret at the end of life. One of the greatest gifts you can give yourself is the permission to say yes to experiences that will enrich your life. Travel more. Try that hobby you’ve always thought about. Invest time in learning something new. These are the things that become cherished memories later on, not the things you wished you had done but didn’t.
Saying yes isn’t just about grand gestures either. Sometimes it’s the smaller experiences that shape us, such as saying yes to spending quality time with loved ones or taking time off work to focus on yourself. These little "yeses" build up, contributing to a fuller, richer life.
Saying Yes to Boundaries That Protect You
Often, when people reflect on their lives, they realize they didn’t set the boundaries that would have made them feel safer or more authentic in their relationships. Establishing boundaries may seem like a hard conversation now, but it’s one of the best ways to care for your future self. When you say yes to what makes you feel respected and valued, you’re essentially saying yes to living in alignment with your own needs.
Saying Yes to Hard Conversations Now
Perhaps one of the toughest aspects of saying yes is confronting difficult conversations. Many of the people I sit with as they near the end of life express a deep regret in not having spoken their truth sooner. Whether it’s a lingering apology, unresolved family tension, or simply sharing your final wishes, these conversations only get harder the longer you wait. Having them now allows you to live with more freedom and provides a sense of closure not just for you, but for those who love you.
Avoiding these hard conversations doesn’t make them disappear—it just postpones the inevitable. And when you finally reach that point, it’s often too late to fully resolve things. Saying yes to these conversations now means facing the discomfort today to gain peace and clarity for the future.
How Saying Yes Now Changes the End-of-Life Journey
As someone who spends time with individuals nearing the end of their lives, I’ve come to see a recurring pattern: those who said yes more—whether to joy, boundaries, or difficult conversations—tend to experience less emotional turmoil in their final days. They can look back on their lives with a sense of completeness, knowing they were active participants in their journey.
Saying yes now is your way of living without unnecessary regrets. It’s about living with purpose and intention, understanding that life is finite, and that the choices you make today shape how you will feel tomorrow.
Final Thoughts: A Life of Yes
You don’t have to wait until you're in the final stages of life to begin saying yes to the things that matter. The opportunity is right here, right now, to make decisions that will lead to a more fulfilling life. Whether it’s experiences, boundaries, or tough conversations, the best time to say yes is today.
If you’ve ever felt like you're putting off something important, now is your chance. Say yes to living a life that feels true to you. Whether you need guidance through the end-of-life planning process or support in navigating these meaningful decisions, I’m here as your Death Doula to walk this path with you.
Life is about moments, connections, and choices. So why wait? Let’s start saying yes to the life you truly want.
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